Don't try this at home or

out in public......

I am trying to post 2 fishing nets, many knickers and an Andy-present to Zoe (http://users.pandora.be/quarsan/zoe/index.html) and it's not been as easy as you may think.

I parcelled all the stuff up, which resulted in a 6 foot tall, top heavy, brown paper lollipop, and decided to combine a walk to the Post Office with walking the daft dog. Hmmm.

It all went a bit Pete-Tong when I got to the Post Office. To start with I 'pretended' to tie the dog up - which she usually falls for - and all went well for a while. She obviously got a bit bored with me queuing and wandered in to join me sniffing and inspecting the now huge queue, much to their amusement. Due to a change in posting things pricing, I was told that as the parcel was over 90cm, it would cost over £18. Oh-my-gawd........... But if I cut it down to size then it would only be £4 ish. Sorry Zed, it's stunted nets for you.

So I left the Post Office with net-shaped parcel and dog in tow. The PO is right next to the park so we turned in to walk through there. Maddy was persistently sniffing at my bag which had her frisbee in so I got it out, skillfully threw it about 6 feet and then it took her about 34 seconds to rip that to shreds and then.....

Well, then she spied the long bamboo poles from the fishing nets - and attacked them. Took me and 2 other people to drag her off the bloody things, and then I had to repeat this procedure all the way home.

Nightmare.

Of course all any one else could see was this overly large chocolate labrador crunching through bamboo whilst growling and baring her teeth. I wanted to make sure there was still at least 90cm to send to Zoe so was trying to remove it reasonably carefully. Maddy thought this was a great game and growled more. Must have looked like I was in fear of my life.

Oh well - shall try sending abbreviated fishing nets tomorrow.