Tagged or what?

MKWM (http://www.mkwm.blogspot.com/) has tagged me. I'm a tag virgin so I guess I attack the questions and then lumber someone else with them. Here goes.

Three Things That Scare Me:

1. Having to go to the funeral of either of my children.
2. Spiders. Yes I know I'm bigger and they're probably more frightened of me. But trust me, head to head, I'm the most scared.
3. Heights. In my mind there are 2 categories of height. Horrible injury and certain death. I can just about cope with certain death, it's the horrible injury that freaks me out.

Three People Who Make Me Laugh:

1. Mike Wright, he is by far the funniest person I have ever met.
2. Jeremy Clarkson (I think it's a middle-aged woman thing).
3. My youngest sister Charlotte, but she can make me cry too.

Three Things I Love:

1. My family.
2. Handbags - they always fit.
3. Cadbury's Creme Eggs.

Three Things I Hate:

1. Celery.
2. BO and halitosis.
3. My father-in-law (something I'm not proud of, but it's true).

Three Things I Don't Understand:

1. The attraction of taking drugs.
2. Why I will never be thin.
3. Anything Jonathan says - especially when he tries to add his version of reasoning.

Three Things On My Desk:

I only have a home desk and it's shared with all the family:

1. A pair of old sunglasses and an empty Coke can (thank you Theo).
2. A lamp that isn't plugged in.
3. My file for Financial Reporting and Management Accounting - open so I can pretend I'm doing 'something for uni' when I'm really doing this.

Three Things I'm Doing Right Now:

1. Mediating - between the kids
2. Trying to ignore the television. Ysabella's watching Mr Bean, which I hate with a vengence.
3. Overheating. Is it my age, the heating, or because it's Spring now the clocks have changed.

Three Things I Want To Do Before I Die:

1. See my grandchildren.
2. Go to Alaska/Canada.
3. Please myself for a whole week. Without having to consider one person at all. And preferably before I'm too old to appreciate it.

Three Things I Can Do:

1. Drive well (but doesn't everybody think they can do that?)
2. Text for Britain. I have a demon left thumb and I probably have a pretty high wpm count.
3. Throw a decent barbecue - with a little help from the rest of the family.

Three Things I Can't Do:

1. Ice skate - but then why would I want to?
2. Get my legs over my head. I used to be able to but I can't any more.
3. Light a barbecue - that's why I have to keep Jonathan.

Three Things I Think You Should Listen To:

1. Your heart.
2. My sister sing - she's not at all bad really for a soprano. Look out for her appearing near you, her name is Sarah Estill, tell her I sent you.
3. Me.

Three Things I'd Like To Learn:

1. To ride a motorbike.
2. How to be a great parent.
3. How to lose weight and keep it OFF.

Three Favourite Foods:

1. Salad, especially a great Chicken Caesar Salad - but NO celery, ever.
2. Fruit. I eat shit loads of the stuff most days. Don't like pears though and apples and oranges are boring. Having a big mango thing at the moment.
3. Pasta, but I rarely eat it these days.

Three Shows I Watched As A Kid:

1. Blue Peter, of course.
2. Andy Pandy.
3. I love Lucy.

Three things you should never listen to:

1. A baby crying for a cuddle - just pick the wee thing up and enjoy.
2. My daughter when she is in Queen Bitch mode.
3. Anything by the Smiths or Morrisey

Three Wonderful People to Inflict My Meme On:

I was going to choose The Gothster (http://spanishgoth.blogspot.com/) for his sympathy regarding my recent night 'out' in Bingley but Drama Queen got him, so......

1. Tired Dad (http://tireddad2.blogspot.com/) because he needs to remember life before kids.
2. I shall also pick on f:lux (http://fluxpix.blogspot.com/) too cos she has the decency to not put celery in ratatouille
3. And why not Mr Farty (http://betterootthanin.blogspot.com/) because I'm pleased he vents his wind in Scotland and not round these parts.